The Hanukkat Habayit and Mikveh, as Seen in Season 3 of ‘Nobody Wants This,’ Explained

Editorial Note: Spoilers ahead for season three of “Nobody Wants This.”

The first two seasons of “Nobody Wants This,” Netflix’s runaway hit show about a rabbi who falls for a woman who isn’t Jewish, have featured Jewish customs familiar to a wide American audience: gathering for Shabbat dinner, planning a bat mitzvah, lusting over a young Mandy Patinkin. But in season three, the show brings us two Jewish traditions that may be less familiar to the broader Netflix audience: the hanukkat habayit and the mikveh. 

Hanukkat Habayit

In episode three, Noah and Joanne throw a housewarming party. Joanne suggests they hang the final mezuzah in their home at the celebration, and impresses Noah with her new Jewish knowledge by saying they can make it a “hanukkat habayit.” A hanukkat habayit is an open-ended ritual, which means you don’t have to do any one specific thing, but Joanne is right: hanging a mezuzah is often how people choose to fulfill this custom. And yes, it does share a root with the word Hanukkah — it means “dedication of the house.” (Hanukkah means “dedication.”)

The hanukkat habayit is a Jewish custom, not a law, so the way it’s practiced varies widely: For Sephardic Jews in Amsterdam in the 1700s it was an opportunity to study Torah; for Noah and Joanne it was an opportunity to make Joanne’s ex jealous and impress Noah’s co-worker. I would venture a guess that many of us haven’t heard of the custom at all (Noah even jokes that it’s “too Jewish” for him).

But is it surprising that we’ve taken a very basic instruction and turned it into an excuse to pack our house with people we love and feed them? Honestly, it’s more surprising that we haven’t turned this into a ritual so big it requires an endcap at Target and an entire section of recipes on The Nosher.

The Mikveh

In the final episode of season three, Joanne completes her conversion by going to the mikveh, a ritual bath. Jewish law dictates that the mikveh happens just before certain lifecycle events, like marriage and conversion to Judaism — which means Joanne’s mikveh ended up happening at the perfect time.

“The water of the mikveh is designed to ritually cleanse a person from deeds of the past. The convert is considered by Jewish law to be like a newborn child,” My Jewish Learning explains. “By spiritually cleansing the convert, the mikveh water prepares him or her to confront God, life, and people with a fresh spirit and new eyes — it washes away the past, leaving only the future. Of course, this does not deny that there were good and beautiful aspects of the past. But, in the strictest religious sense, that past was only prologue to a future life as a Jew.”

Though in “Nobody Wants This” Joanne chooses the ocean as her mikveh (which is totally kosher), in many Jewish communities there is a designated space for it. Joanne likens those spaces to “a tiny pool like I’m in a motel hot tub,” and sure, not every mikveh is luxurious, but some could definitely be described as spa-like. Who wouldn’t want to dunk themself in this luxurious mikveh in Los Angeles? (Joanne, I guess.)

Depending on specific customs, the ceremony can go a few different ways. In Joanne’s case, she submerges herself three times, saying a prayer each time: first the mikveh blessing, then the Shema and finally the Shehechiyanu.

Celebrations following the mikveh ceremony vary (though it’s definitely not customary to rent a beach house), but the Roklovs and the Williamses clearly love to entertain — and without these events, where would all their drama happen?

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